Hitler in Hollywood

22 Mar

Does this mustache make me look fat?

So…no one can resist the alluring sparkle of Hollywood. Not even Hitler.

I know a lot of weird little facts, but I did not know that Hitler was planning on coming to Los Angeles. The only thing Hollywood and Hitler related I was aware of was his weird fascination with Clark Gable. (I can’t judge him for his impeccable taste in men!) During WWII, Hitler offered a sizable reward to anyone who could capture and bring Gable to him unharmed. What was he going to do with Gable if he was caught? Play cards? I think not.

Anyway, the Nazis in LA set up a ranch for  his arrival. The place is called Murphy Ranch and his plot of land was outfitted with a diesel power plant, a 375,000 gallon water tank, a giant meat locker and a bomb shelter. Who designed that place, the dad from ‘Blast From The Past?’

It's a bit of a fixer upper.

The Feds  raided the compound the day after Pearl Harbor and a bunch of Nazi-sympathizers were rounded up and arrested. What’s left of this place is going to be torn down in order to build a rest site for campers.

Now, let’s get back to the thought of Hitler in Hollywood. I feel like that is a Mel Brooks movie/musical waiting to happen!

Hitler would sneak into LA on the sly. He changes his name and decides to go after his true dream, becoming a STAR! He works his way up the ranks at a movie studio and he can’t help but fall in love with the daughter of a Jewish studio head.  Because of her he changes and becomes a better person and therefore a better actor. With the support of his best gal, he finally lands his break out role and as he accepts his Oscar, he reveals his true identity.

Eh, I’m sure Mel could do something a lot better with the idea, but it’s interesting to think about.

Nelson Riddle and his whole “snitch ass bitch” Orchestra performing ‘Hooray For Hollywood.’


3 Responses to “Hitler in Hollywood”

  1. Bruce Allen March 22, 2012 at 12:35 PM #

    That’s incredible. Hitler had a crush on Clark Gable? He wanted to come to Hollywood? No one is immune to the lure of LA, I guess.

    • L March 25, 2012 at 12:34 PM #

      I wonder what he planned on doing with Gable if he ever got him? The tag line, “Gable’s back and Garson’s got him” works way better than “Gable’s back and Hitler’s got him.”

  2. Maybelline March 22, 2012 at 1:52 PM #

    Very good. I thought trivia and a tablecloth would have been woven into the story. That acid trip structure must reek with some awful smells. Yeesh!
    The Nelson Riddle Orchestra sounds so very similar to the Doc Seversenson Band of Johnny Carson’s Tonight Show fame.
    By the way, I have to go into a Board meeting shortly and will have the tune “Springtime for Hiltler & Germany” playing in my brain. Hope it doesn’t spill out some how.

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