My Smile Still Stays On

8 Aug

Does this look like someone who’s completely disappointed? Give me an Oscar already.

So…Harry’s cousin, Matt, is back from the Army, and after two and a half years, I got to see my pals again! Unfortunately for me, they wanted to go to my work. Totally where I wanted to be on a Saturday in the middle of summer, but for Harry, anything.  I remembered how much fun we used to have and just knew it was going to be like old times. I couldn’t wait!

I had gone over what seeing him would be like a million times in my head. But, in reality, it was like most reality based things, underwhelming. I sat at the spot where we were to met and he walked right passed me. Apparently he didn’t recognize me because he was looking for red hair…even though he knew I’ve been blonde for years. I got a lame, short,  hug and a polite, “What’s new?”

OK, after a few years, maybe things are a little rusty, I get it. Not everyone thinks about life like they’re in a movie…like me.

Ever observant, Matt pointed out that these hats looked like a bra. I tested it out, yep.

The day went on and Matt and I were cracking jokes and ripping on weirdos like we’d done a million times before.  Harry was VERY quiet, not making  jokes or giving much to any conversation.  He showed less than zero interest in what’s going on in my life, which I always find to be a fabulous trait for a “friend” to have, but decided to ignore that for the time being. Roger met us for drinks and Harry, who has met Rog before, had no idea who he was to me or where I knew him from. (Wow! Beyond rude.) I had to repeat stories from when we lived together because he’d forgotten them and others that I knew I had told him and are even on my blog! God forbid he put effort into anything not regarding himself and read this. I try to make it, at least, mildly entertaining! I felt like I had been “erased…from existence.”  What really set me over the edge was when he told me he had been down here on vacation last year and didn’t even stop in to tell me hello. Hiroshima happened in my brain when I heard that bull crap.

At work, on my day off. The definition of a good friend.

My very own Harry Burns, my buddy, old pal had turned into a shell of himself.  A completely beastly, boring, bourgeois, zombie of what he once was. I don’t know how, in under three years, someone I cared for so much could turn into someone who, if I met them in a bar for the first time, I would never want to talk to again. I almost bawled my eyes out at the fireworks (but never let it show, thank you British genes!)  because I was so disappointed and upset at what he’d turned into and what I had lost. Luckily during this extremely depressing turn of events in my life, I listened to the theme music from movies of my childhood, and I realized that even though this feels like hell, I still have movies. I can throw all my energy into my (screen)writing.

I’ll follow Freddie’s sage advice:

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14 Responses to “My Smile Still Stays On”

  1. Maybelline August 8, 2012 at 8:42 AM #

    The man in the orange shirt (final photo) is striking a pose that I strike almost every weekend at Wool Growers with tourists/parties are snapping photos. I wonder how many images have captured my soul.

  2. Bruce Allen August 8, 2012 at 10:59 AM #

    Sucks. I don’t always like that people drift in and out of our lives, people you’re inseparable from now, you’ll barely see in five years. In this case though, it seems like a positive for you. You’re moving forward.
    On the plus side, a Lois Chiles sighting in the TWWW clip! No one was hotter in the 70’s. I will NOT argue this.

  3. auntiea August 11, 2012 at 10:39 PM #

    Move on, but draw the line if he wants to share with you how badly his wife is treating him, blah, blah, blah.

  4. WOW! August 14, 2012 at 9:51 PM #

    Wow.
    Yes, how dare he change over the course of several years (especially being in the service, which can be an incredibly intense experience). How dare he not dedicate his spare time to reading your insipid, narcissistic blog posts about your unhealthy obsession with a celebrity and your caustic (but hardly clever!) observations of humanity. How dare he expect that he would not have to perform to your liking for fear he should become “boring,” “beastly,” or “bourgeois” (the last of which I am fairly certain you don’t actually know how to use properly).

    It seems you have not once entertained the thought that being in the service would give someone more to focus on then your unabashed vacuity. Also your comment about Hiroshima: Really? You are comparing your total overreaction to the changes in your friendship to the death of over 80,000 people? On second thought, perhaps that IS an accurate description of the space between your ears.

    I have rarely read something so utterly self-absorbed in my life. Remarkably impressive–and no, that’s not a compliment. I don’t think losing your friendship would be much of a loss; the level of entitlement you possess is disgusting.

    • Lauren Semar August 14, 2012 at 10:28 PM #

      Dear WOW!

      Let me help you out. MATT, Harry’s cousin, is in the service and has NOT changed one bit. Had he changed after being in the service, I would have been WAY more understanding. HARRY, my old pal, is the one who has changed and is NOT in the military.

      Good luck with those basic reading skills. I believe in you!

      • Lauren Semar August 14, 2012 at 10:45 PM #

        Maybe I should start using a word of the day on the blog. Here’s today’s word, bourgeois.

        bour·geois (adj)
        \ˈbu̇rzh-ˌwä also ˈbu̇zh- or ˈbüzh- or bu̇rzh-ˈ\
        Definition of BOURGEOIS
        1: of, relating to, or characteristic of the social middle class
        2: marked by a concern for material interests and respectability and a tendency toward mediocrity
        3: snobby-without-realizing-it, upper-middle-class sensibilities.

        —-Pretty sure I know how to use that word.

      • WOW! August 15, 2012 at 12:31 AM #

        Lulz you edited it to make it somewhat clearer, but hardly so.

        The rest of what was said in my comment remains accurate.

    • Maybelline August 15, 2012 at 7:07 AM #

      Hey Wow, tell Harry ‘hello’.
      Now scat. (If you’re looking up the word, choose the definition regarding animals first.)

  5. Lauren Semar August 15, 2012 at 1:30 AM #

    Dear Wow!

    I only visited Fantasyland, but clearly, you are a resident of that locality! Your comment, based on the false notion that Harry was in the service, was inaccurate. The incorrect argument that I don’t know how to properly use the word bourgeois was debunked, which also crucifies your statement about there being nothing betwixt my ears.

    Maybe you’re just confused about what accurate really means. Let me help you out:

    ac·cu·rate (adj)
    \ˈa-kyə-rət, ˈa-k(ə-)rət\

    1: free from error
    2: conforming exactly to truth or to a standard
    3: able to give an accurate result

    Basically, your comments are the OPPOSITE of what that word means.

  6. Oh Wise One August 15, 2012 at 10:23 AM #

    Friendships always seem to drift apart. These things happen in life. Wish Harry the very best and treasure the fun times you had. You never know what the future will bring.

    * You may use my words of wisdom in a fortune cookie if you wish.

  7. SadPanda2001 August 15, 2012 at 8:47 PM #

    Dear Wow,

    You really are talking out of turn, kid. It’s almost like you don’t get it at all what this blog and the previous one was about. I have never commented on this blog, but this is the one time in years I felt the need to.

    Do you really think we read this blog for a balanced perspective? Lauren is entertainment and she’s good at it. We don’t come here to read a nice girl’s adventures and view of the world! We’re (mostly all) here to enjoy the narcissistic ranting of a bitchy girl who can’t quite get it. Lauren is our The New Girl on steroids with the extra pounds that come with them. And we love her that way!

    Some of us have followed Lauren for several years, hair color changes, and even from blogger to wordpress. And do you know why? She makes us feel good about ourselves. So what if she rips some smart-looking guy to shreds? What do you care? Or haven’t you been paying attention? This guy Harry turned her down for homecoming, kept her in the friend zone, and is GETTING MARRIED soon to someone else. Do you really think Lauren isn’t going to want to put her unconsumated Harry in the hate department?

    Wow, you have a good vocabulary, but you’re a bit slow on the uptake. Good luck with that. Maybe you should find a softer, simpler blog to follow… like http://fluffy-bunny.tumblr.com/ perhaps. Unless you find the psych ward ironically hilarious, this isn’t the blog for you.

    Sincerely,
    Sad Panda

    And to Lauren:
    You might be sempiternally single, but people love you. Not everyone can say that. I’d say don’t ever change, but I do think your one flaw is having such attractive friends. Throw in a few chubbier ones so that you can be “the pretty one” for a change. Twinkle, twinkle, Lauren! Twinkle, twinkle.

    Going back to lurking now, but I’m always watching… if you need me.

  8. Tatiana August 16, 2012 at 7:27 AM #

    So you want the guy you obsess over from time to time on this blog to read your blog? Honey maybe it’s time to get over him. Seriously how long ago was this dance that he shot you down at? You will be way happier if you just get over it.

    • Lauren Semar August 16, 2012 at 5:00 PM #

      Well, I never said anything about a dance. So, hello person I probably know but is hiding their real identity. And “obsess over?” I’ve talked about Harry in maybe 4 posts out of the 147 I’ve published. That doesn’t look like I’m too good at being obsessive, Honey Boo Boo Child.

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